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Dirty XXX Jokes

A mother had 3 daughters. They were all getting married within a short time period. Because mom was a bit worried about how their sex lives would get started, she made them all promise to send a postcard ...

Created:
07/22/2007
Views:
3208
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An American was waiting on a London street corner. An attractive English girl was passing by when a gust of wind blew her dress above her waist.
"A bit airy..." remarked the American.
...

Created:
07/23/2007
Views:
2370
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A Koala bear decides he wants to get laid, so he picks up a hooker. He goes down on her several times and they are really enjoying themselves. After they are finished the koala bear starts getting dressed. ...

Created:
07/22/2007
Views:
1976
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There were three friends, a alcoholic, a chain smoker, and a homosexual. They went to the doctor and he said if they indulge in anymore of their activities they would surely die.
One night they ...

Created:
12/14/2007
Views:
2850
Rating:
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What do I know about sex? I'm a married man."
- Tom Clancy
"I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesomethings that money can buy."
- Steve Martin
"You ...

Created:
07/23/2007
Views:
2338
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A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and noticed he had his collar on backwards. The little boy asked why he wore his collar that way.
The man, who was a priest, said, ...

Created:
07/29/2007
Views:
2027
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Finally, a definition of Marketing that makes sense.... You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, "I'm fantastic in bed." That's Direct Marketing. You're at a party with a bunch ...

Created:
07/22/2007
Views:
1912
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A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves. "Do you know how they make these gloves?" he asked. "No, I don't." ...

Created:
04/13/2007
Views:
19822
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A fellow stops by to visit his friend who is paralyzed from the waist down. They talk for a while and then the friend asks, "My feet are cold. Would you be so kind as to go get me my shoes please?"
The ...

Created:
09/07/2007
Views:
3654
Rating:
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Recent research shows that there are five kinds of sex: - The first kind of sex...SMURF SEX. This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone and you both have sex until you are blue in the ...

Created:
07/23/2007
Views:
2188
Rating:
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A man walked into a supermarket with his zipper down, and his fly wide open.
A lady cashier walked up to him and said, "Your barracks door is open.
"This is not a phrase men normally use, so ...

Created:
04/13/2007
Views:
2173
Rating:
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There's this kid who lives on a farm. He comes home from school in a really bad mood. He sees a pig and kicks it. Then he sees a chicken and kicks that. Then he walks into the house.
"I saw ...

Created:
07/22/2007
Views:
2966
Rating:
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An infamous stud with a long list of conquests walked into his neighborhood bar and ordered a drink.
The bartender thought he looked worried and asked him if anything was wrong.
"I'm ...

Created:
04/13/2007
Views:
1996
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The only thing that the IRS has not yet taxed is the male penis. This is due to the fact that 40% of the time it is hanging around unemlpoyed, 30% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed ...

Created:
04/13/2007
Views:
2344
Rating:
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The year is 2222 and Mike and Maureen land on Mars after accumulating enough frequent flier miles. They meet a Martian couple and are talking about all sorts of things.
Mike asks if Mars has ...

Created:
06/05/2007
Views:
3305
Rating:
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A women on her deathbed called her husband and instructed him to look under their bed and open the wooden box he found. He was puzzled by the 3 eggs and $7,000 in cash he found in the box, so he asked ...

Created:
07/22/2007
Views:
2087
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Three mice are at a bar, having drinks, talking about how tough they are. The first mouse slams down a shot of booze, says, "Let me tell you how tough I am."
I spot a trap and go for the cheese. ...

Created:
05/22/2007
Views:
2294
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A prominent Canadian doctor was visiting an American hospital. During his tour of the floors, he passed a room where a male patient was openly and vigorously masturbating.
"My GOD," said the ...

Created:
12/14/2007
Views:
2983
Rating:
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A guy on a date parks and gets the girl in the back seat and they make love. The girl wants it again and the guy obliges her. She wants more and they do it again. She still wants more and the guy says ...

Created:
07/23/2007
Views:
2983
Rating:
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A prominent Columbia Maryland Yuppette had her teenage niece from New York visiting for the summer. She decided to sit down and have a talk with the girl explaining how things were done in Yuppie City. ...

Created:
07/23/2007
Views:
1601
Rating:
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