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Fucking Machine

A man was going away on a trip for work. Before he left he stopped at an Adult Toy store to pick up something for his wife while he was away because she was a sex-aholic.

He didnt want her fucking just any guy so when he went into the store he told the clerk his issue.

The man said "I have just what you need".

He went to the back and brought out a large green box. "This is my little green fucking machine. It never tires and it will "DO" whatever you want it to. Just say "Little Green Fucking Machine", and whatever you want it to fuck and when you are done just say little green fucking machine off. It wont stop til it's off".

So the man bought the toy and went home to show his wife. She was very amused and decided to use it no more than 5 minutes after he left.

"Little green fucking machine....me". She and the machine went at it for 4 or 5 hours.

When she was done she realized she didn't remember the command to turn it off. So she threw it off of her and ran away....butt naked.

A neighbor saw the woman running in the nude and called the police.

When the police officer stopped the woman about a mile down the road she told him the whole story.

When she was through the officer laughed and replied "little green fucking machine my ass".

Average: 2.6 (48 votes)
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Created: 04/13/2007 - 17:00
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angus thongs (not verified) | Fri, 01/01/2010 - 10:41

I heard this b4 and it was funnier as a voodoo dick instead of a little green fucking machine. In the voodoo dick joke an officer pulls the women over for wreckless driving cuz she's got a voodoo dick in her and she's driving back to the sex store she bought it at, which makes more sense then her butt naked explaining the entire story while the little green fucking machine is somewhere else. Still this version did seem a little shorter even with the longer name

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